3 a.m.

It’s 3 a.m. and I have tried all the usual things in the usual order to induce sleep: 1. passionate and amazing moments with passionate and amazing spouse 2. read boring book 3. surf facebook 4. watch hours of youtube videos.  Still I feel no compulsion to crawl back into bed.

They say insomnia is a temporary thing.  Avoid caffeine, keep to a routine.  Still I am awake and realizing that I’m not avoiding sleep, I’m avoiding life.  I’m avoiding life by obsessing over it.  I think over and over about how to make it better, instead of accepting what is and what will never be.  This too shall pass.  I know this.  Unfortunately it usually passes about 30 minutes before I am suppose to be awake and ready to start my day.

(Source: pentacular)